ok, so i guess i just need to get some restless poetry out of my system. writing a song didn't quite quench more inspirational thirst. listening to the waves makes me feel lucky. i know i am in this position for a reason, we all have our own paths to take. paths that lead us to people, places and through situations out of our control.

would you regret not telling someone they are beautiful? if you meant it with all your heart, knowing nothing would ever develop? if so, how can one make it meaningful and 'friendly'?

could you live in a small town, where everyone knew everything about you? or do you like the city life of individual personal space?

Staying in Negra, has opened my eyes up in so many ways. i never imagined I could do ANYTHING (almost) i set my mind too. I mean you hear things like " all things are possible with Christ" all the time. but to really feel empowered to do something is a tremendous feeling! I am wondering if God would really allow me to buy a place here, i feel like a shrimp. like i am a super small fish in a big BIG pond. i would really like to build a home, and raise a family here. i am actually super stoked about the whole idea.

i have a few options

1. buy property and or a home to live in.

2. marry a costa rican, so we can make a life here

3. all of the above. :)

Only God knows, but for the moment, i will just sit here and listen to the waves roll in. illbreathe, and enjoy this very second. i will never get another second exactly like this one again. man, i wish you were here.

Thank FULL list!

1. shared the gospel with coco! he totally recieved it!

2. played the guitar a little tonight.

3. went to Tamarindo by ATV. thankful i got to tamarindo, but i dont want to ride on a ATV for a LONGGGGG time!!

4. got a rad hand me down shirt

5. can sit here and listen to the waves. i want this to last forever. i think i am made to live life by the sea.

6. life lasts only moments! and i love them so much! i love everything i am given.

7. soooo thankful for Jesus and His love over me

8. had a piece on homemade keylime pie. :) favorite kind.

9. convinced myself that fatty fruits like mango's , coconuts and nana;s have enough fats to sustain my sweet tooth. :)

blessed beyond anything,

Lindsay

my heart about heart break

"There's one thing i wanted to say, so Ill be brave
you were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there is nothing to save.

Stars

Just reading through some of my old journal entries, I liked these lyrics, and so I finally bought the song. Going to Kon tiki tonight for a farewell dinner.

Peace. Have a wonderful update!!!!

Mmmm Bop!

Yo! Life is unbelievable. No cell phone, a/c, only the pure nature and yes, internet. :) there is nothing to do with mmmmm bop here. i know you got excited!!!

inspirations from today:

coldplay lyrics: "i saw God come to my garden, but i dont know what He said, for my heart wasn;t open." i wanna be open Lord.

Reading good literature to my children, so they will be brillant.

Lindsay's Corner

life. im so glad it doesnt go the way i plan it. today was another beautiful day. the hours seem to slip away with each passing wave, conversation and walk. i just got home from eating dinner at Christine's house, we talked and caught up on life. shared stories, watched the 7 kids skateboard and bike around the patio. it was priceless. sometimes i just can't wait to be a mother, and hang out with my children. i know they will be so awesome. yea, so that's about it. i mean life. like i said before, i am glad it doesn't always go the way i plan, because then i would miss out on what God wants me to see.

Prayer requests

Johnny, that he would know Jesus is the Living Master. He is very close in his beliefs about spiritual things. but doesn't accept christ as God. Backround: talented surfer, artist and musician. has a 13 year old daughter, is divorced. super sweet. outgoing and personable.

For christine and her family: they are moving back to cali. that they will be able to come back to costa rica soon, and that all the last minute things would be taken care of. esp to sell their van!

For me, that i would wisely invest my resources into something eternal. God would continually walk me through each and every decision, for His recognition.

Thankful List

1. a ride from gaby, which saved me like an hours walk!
2. dinner @ Christine's. I have no more cash... i'm living on faith!! haha i love it like this. God always provides!
3. Th new shirt i got from Christine's hand-me-downs.
4. having a heavy duty green smoothie
5. seeing a humongous tranchula!! zoila, be glad you weren't there.
6. being around the kids
7. being able to be myself around God, and feel fully accepted and embraced.
8. having a clay facial
9. having 5 bananas to eat :) yummy...
10 seeing camilla this morning.
11 got invited to eat with Lucia. she teaches in an indigenious village in Argentina, and she said i can go and teach dance there.
12 learning that the number 8 means "new beginnings" and the number 9 means "judgement upon your actions" also fruitfulness.

So ill be seeing you in a few days... less than 2 weeks. i am pretty stoked to return, because i know God has a reason for everything. so, thanks for following with me these past couple weeks. summed up in one word, that is to describe my trip;
Nurtured.

Be nurturers of the Lord.

In peace,
Lindsay

wanna know what's going on? :)

45 minutes ago i was watching "Endless Summer" in my little room. but i saw that the sun was beginning to set, so i jumped out of bed, slipped my sneakers on, threw a water bottle in my bag and jetted down the stairs en route to the beach. watching the sun set is like watching the nightly news. it's essential. it's the closing of another day. the ending to a day that will never happen again.

for instance...

zoila and robbie will never leave me at Playa Negra again :(
i won't be totted around on the back of coco's atv looking at properties the same way i did today.
won't wear my bathing suit for the 2nd time in my bathing suits life.
won't mistake a firefly for an airplane.

but you never know what life will bring to you... it's full of wonderfully satisfying surprises. i was telling phil today, that in high school, i was highly disciplined. i thought i was going to dance in a professional company. not, i look at my life, and it's opposite of disciplined. i do whatever i want, when i want. (within reason) and it's highly unpredictable. i mean for the most part i will stay in negra and surf everyday until i leave. but other than that, who knows what adventure surprise lies ahead?

But tonight I found myself wishing for more. a life that's greener. one where i am with all my friends, in the place of my dreams, with the man of my dreams, and im smiling so flippin big, and it lasts FOREVER! i guess im describing our wedding day to Jesus, huh? haha no, but seriously, after z and rob left, i felt a little homesick for the first time. i didn't help that it rained most of the day, leaving me inside to watch movies. :/ im not a movie buff... but endless summer is definitely a must.

things i am totally 100% thankful for in my life RIGHT NOW!

1. writing all this stuff down, especially the part about mistaking a fire fly for an airplane. it reminds me of the simplicity of life here. airplanes don't fly over these parts. simple as that.

2. i just enjoyed my monthly candy bar. milky way. haha

3. the waves are pounding really hard right now, and i can hear it from here. i love the way waves sound, because i fond it so unbelievable that i am in such a beautiful place.

4. blood is joyfully running through my body, and my body is perfectly still.

5. i feel loved by God in a big way.

6. Anything is possible, if you truly want it to be. i want to build a big treehouse one day in a beautiful place that has perfect waves, so i can surf whenever i want to.

7. That I can sit and just think about life. truly ask myself important questions. make important decisions. or listen to the crickets, and the waves make a musical melody.

8. i am single and i can do anything i feel God wants me to do.

i'm so sorry, i forget people read this, i am sure you may have scanned through all the things i said i was thankful for. i probably would too. i just got lost in writing it. ive been exercising my thankful muscles, because it keeps the flabby depression thoughts away :)

well, buenas noches mis amigos.

reflections on robie and zoila's vacation

Hey family and friends,

I haven't updated in a few days, but life has steadily been going... so excitingly!

I do have some prayer requests please! :)

1. I feel a little weak inside my spirit concerning temptation. I am chosing to remember to keep my Spirit focused on her lover, Christ. Pray for me, that every other idol, myself and/or others (the flesh) would utterly fail me, and my hope would be steadfast and expectant upon Jesus, and His promises over my life. :)


Praises:

I have some funny highlights since Robbie and Zoila have came! Highlight number 1:

1. RIVER CROSSING::

so, we are driving home from the airport in our rental car. to save some money i told robbie and zoila not to get a 4X4, but a compact vehicle. We get a peugot! For the record, the streets here are a step better than a well-worn beaten path, notheless, we are putt-putting around the guanacaste region looking for casa papaya. "This doesn't look right" i declare, as we drive down a terribly bumpy road. then the gps automated voice warns us that there is a "river crossing up ahead, 4X4 vehicles only" ...

we look at the large "river crossing" ahead with no expectations. But I know what the others are thinking... "what in the world are we going to do now?" so, robbie and I get out of the car, to see how deep the river actually is. Rob throws a rock, and a huge kaplunk! I throw some also, and we know this is going to be deep. Oh man, adventure is glorious! Zoila is in the car biting her tongue... mama wasn't happy!

So Rob gets back into the car and i stay on the bank to steer him as close to the edge as possible. with our confidence and faith, and basically no other choice, the car is sucessfully driven through the river!! mission accomplished: memory made, and noone got hurt! pphhhfew!

What I loved about this experience was that I felt like Joshua when he went into the promised land. To him, the giants we not that big. To me the river crossing was a mere puddle. I was such a brave moment. I cherish this memory.


2. Zoila, randomly hitting herself in the face (bugs!). and her movie comments to perfectly for our current situations. unbelievable!!!

3. searching for monkey every morning! we finally found 2 this morning, they are so stinkin cute!

4. Eating. our eating together has been so relaxing, we just totally unwind, and relax. it's so special, I want to eat like this every single day of my life! it's so precious and nutritious.

5. our long car rides. everywhere is a journey. it's time we use to talk about all kinds of things.

So, basically, each day has been filled with some unplanned excitement, better than i could imagine! there have been some bumps, but all in all, i couldn't ask for a better time. seriously. i love having time to look at the trees, and read God's word about the Kingdom of God. see how a small mustard seed grows into a huge tree. how a little yeast, goes a long long way. if you just have a little faith, it grows into a huge garden of love...


We concluded that our time was going to be remembered as tree time. May God continue to grow your roots deep into the soil of His love for you. He believes in you!

Your sister,
Lindsay

can it be any more precious?

i just might as well be in heaven. except for the dog scratching its flea right by me! haha

Just checking in.

Daily Activities:
surfed.
made friends with diego.
ate a fat burrito and shared it with pamela.
daydreamed about love
meditated about what I want my relationship with God to look like
got accidentally kissed on the mouth! haha i wish it would of been jeron! haha j/k
laughed at a pack of boys beating each other up.


I have concluded that i have some goals: explanation: at first i thought my goal was only to cultivate meaningful relationships. but then i realized with further introspection that i want a colorful relationship with my Creator. A relationship filled with lively language, places, and people.

why is identifying goals important? because having a goal enables you to make better, faster and more confident decisions toward something you want.

Story Time:
Like today, i went to enjoy the sun falling asleep, but instead got to build a sand castle with a 5 year old. she told me she had a dream about a princess who had crocodiles. i asked her if the princess was scared of the crocs, she said "nope" without even a second thought.

Dude, how amazing is it that we have the ability to change our thoughts, and center them on truth. Are crocodiles scary? not if you grew up swimming in the same waters as them.

i love a wild sense of adventure. today when i was surfing, i was being "taught" by diego a tico. he isn't scared of crocodiles either. in fact, he calls them beautiful. to me, they freak me out. but now im thinking, if these people aren't that afraid of these nasty crocs, then why should i be afraid? so, i'm not that scared anymore. :)

But seriously, right now i am chilling outside on the balcony of casa papaya, which is a beautiful 3 story house. im listening to the night sing me a lullaby. i can hear the waves rolling in the distance. sometimes it's soft, and right now it's roaring!! i don''t ever want this trip to end. i can't believe it has been about a month already! so much has happened and nothing has happened all at the same time.

well, i don't want you to fall asleep as well.

so if you're praying for me, thanks! i need it.

here are a few things im mulling over and chatting with God about now.

1. patience to wait for the man God has predestined me to share life with. i'm pretty stoked about getting married.
2. my dad to get his passport and have a chance to fly here by the end of aug.
3 robbie and zoila to forget what time it is when they arrive, and have an unforgettably relaxing time!
4. trust in God with the tiniest details of my life. He keeps whispering in my spirit, trust me. trusting is adventurous, you never know what may come your way!

i praise God because He breathes meaning into every moment. nature and everything around me, embraces me, because God embraces me. life moves freely from one frame to the next without hesitation or fear. because everything has it's place to show me God's heart and love over his loved ones.

it's crazy for me to think that the world revolves around the God who loves me. and at His command, hearts start to beat and things begin to breathe! im so thankful His my dad, i wanna be just like him. :)

Thanks for reading my rambles, hope they were as enjoyable to read as they were to think about!

Love you!

yo this flesh is gnarly

dude,

i am so excited to be trying to live in the spirt by putting to death my fleshly desires:

keep me in your prayers, because i need God's Almighty strength to keep me running, filled up and brimming over with His Spirit. I want more than anything to be a simple mighty vessel bringing God' s kingdom.


Surfing Update:

today, i went surfing most of the day, and had a wonderful time! the first part of it i was alone, and i was doing really well. i stood up a bunch of times, the waves were perfect, and small enough for me to ride! whoa! God God for making waves... He is amazing!

then forest and the kids came out to play. and we all did another session together. again, the waves were breaking perfectly! it was tremendous! i had a perfect day today.

Jeronimo Update:

i saw him surfing today on sandy beach. i didn't talk to him because i was chatting with the kids and forest.
but i saw him when i was walking, so i decided i should atleast say hello. i did, and we talked about surfing, i asked him if he believed in God and he said "no, not really." we talked some more about life stuff, then it started to rain. he drove me home with a truck full of surfers and that was it. well, not all of it. he invited me to a party tonight, but i prayed about it, and i don't think i should go. something in my spirit was saying "no, do not go!" so i decided to obey. i think my Spirit is warning me of a potential pitfall! Thank you Jesus! I am so excited to obey, for 2 reasons.
1. i'm avoiding unnecessary heart pain and drama, better for both of us.

2. only God understands the full picture right now, and my goal is to listen and obey joyfully. he knows what i want, and He will give it to me when He sees fit.

so, i know God is operating out of love for me, and I praise Him for that! Other than my parents, noone has ever loved me so unconditionally and perfectly. so i will yeild to my husband, and trust that this is His gentle protection over my heart, a well spring of life!

Kids Dance Classes:

We are having our first dance show on Tuesday @ 5pm. :) It's going to be held here at Casa Papaya. the girls will be dancing 4 dance numbers. 2 ballet 2 hip-hop.

I will also be guest starring and doing a dance called "you are for me" haha

pray for us to have an encouraging response to make the girls love dancing, and i hope everyone loves me too!! :)

Updates and Praises!!

Zoila and Robbie are coming into town!! Whoa-hoo!! pray for us to have a wonderful and beautifully peaceful time! I am so excited about their arrival! i will be taking a bus to Santa Cruz solo, so pray for me as well!

Dad is doing well. I have been telling him all these wonderful things about buying a piece of property here. I think it would be a great investment, i am just hoping he will lend me the money to buy it! pray for me to remain calm and at peace during this entire process.

Lindsay: I am doing well also. been super contemplative. thinking about
life: and how to successfully handle emotions
love: today i thought what if i wanted to be married to this guy jeron, would God be mad at me? and i opened up the scriptures to the perfect answer.

13 "My people have committed two sins:
They have forsaken me,
the spring of living water,
and have dug their own cisterns,
broken cisterns that cannot hold water.

dude, if I really believe God is my husband, then I want to let him provide for me. He knows what I want. so me marrying any non-believer would be me "digging my own cistern, a broken one that can't hold water!" how friggin heart breaking is that? to do it ourself and say "i dont need you Lord" not to forget i would be forgetting about my husband, and all the AMAZING life giving water he has provided for me. Every day! Yesterday, I didn't spend any time with God really, but he gave me everything! Food, shelter, clothing, peace, friends, an amazing dinner, a time to build a friendship. Our saviour is so gracious, patient, gentlemen-like yet jealous as hell. dude, i dont want to mess with the flesh, when the Spirit is so perfect. but that humbles me too, because i know what I am, but God lives in me, and i keep my attention there, the best i can, so that i won't sin against Him.

Thanks for reading, yet another one of my blags!!

Lindsay regains her focus

it's been quite a crazy few days!! My original goal for coming here to costa rica, was to focus all my attention on Christ, learn some more spanish and surfing.

if i were to rate it...
time spent with Christ: 85%
learning spanish: 45% most people know english
surfing: 30%

so what have i been doing mostly? oh, that's easy! DREAMING! i do WAY too much of this!

But I have come up with some pretty raw ideas!

for example: number 1: found a piece of land near the beach, now i wanna build a treehouse on it one day! i am seriously praying about this and looking into different ways i can get the money to buy this land. i dream of having that treehouse, so all my friends can come and hang out with me. we can listen to the wind blowing through the trees. i will grow my own garden with great, clean food. we'll have a fire pit in the middle and lie around in hammocks reading books. it's going to be called "brillante: the eagles nest sanctuary" something like that. it's going to be a place where people come for healing and rest and to unwind from the rat race. this is how my experience has been since i have been here, and i would like others to experience it as well. i feel like this is the way life is to be lived. working hard during the day to have food on the table at night, but also having a place you love and enjoy. most importantly, with people you love and care about. how do i convince all my friends to come here with me? i dont know yet, i guess ill just invite them and let them see for themselves.

i guess this dream will take a while to fulfill, but i am excited, because it will be an art project for me, as well as an investment for the future

so yeah, i have been dreaming a lot lately. as well as being distracted by guys! there are so many dudes, i can see how the enemy can strategically tempt me in this area.

i do think one thing is interesting as i process, not hanging out with a guy alone stuff.

1. how in the world am i ever going to meet a dude? it seems so impossible! if i dont hang out with a guy alone ever as a friend, i won't get that close. but you know what? it has to be better than hanging out with a man, and becoming attached and then feeling heart broken when it ends. anything is better than that! and i was on the beach today thinking. "God must have kept me single for this long, to allow me to finally be thankful for it!" i can finally say i am so happy being single, i have such freedom! freedom to do whatever i want to! how come i wasn't enjoying this before? dude, if you are single and you are reading this, start thinking of all the things you can do, because you are single. God wants you to be content in every situation life gives to you. you have to choose to be excited about your singleness, so do it! not only will it make you more enjoyable to be around, but others will want to be around you as well. Look who is talking like an expert all of a sudden!? but, im just talking through my own experience. i am soo thankful that i am being spared from all the heart break drama that comes with dating.

speaking of... here is my victory!!

Jeronimo Update:

I was suppost to see him surf yesterday, but was intercepted (thankfully) on the way there by a couple from the church. So, i have yet to introduce the Jeronimo character to my blog. He's a drop dead gorgeous surfer guy here. he grew up here, but is originally from peru. anyways, one night a couple of us went to his parents restaurant and he was our waiter. we casually talked afterwards, no big deal. the end of that night. a few nights later, we went to this awesome party for a recycling fund raiser. he was there, and we danced the whole night together. i found out some stuff i didnt particularly care for, and again. all casual, no big deal. the end of that night. so again we ran into each other at another gathering, and there we talked a little more and thats when we made casual plans to surf together. so thats when i got intercepted by the couple from the church, i was on my way to the beach to surf with him! im really glad i made the choice not to hang out alone with him, because when i went down to the beach today he was macking with a different girl! haha funny funny


Lindsay's men analysis:

men make me laugh! i wish i understood just how a guy choses a lady. to me it seems like they try every apple in the whole barrel, and when they are ready to marry, the one who is most like their mother, is the one they marry. am i crazy? maybe that's just how i see it. haha seriously, i just know God is making me into His beautiful bride, and we'll see what comes and when it comes. life is easy and its a beauty when its lived in the reality of having Christ as your husband.

Horray for scripture! and God help me!

Thanks for reading! You are so precious and beautiful! sooo precious AND beautiful!

would you come to a summer dance program in costa rica?

if i were to host a summer dance program in costa rica, with 3 classes a day. Ballet, Pointe, Modern, Hip-hop and Lyrical. Surf in the morning, classes in the afternoon, bible studies in the evening.

Do you think i could get a lot of students to come to this? I would have to audition students and only the advanced dancer would be considered.

we could have missions adventures to nicaraqua, ministering to the people who live in the dumps.

and they girls in the program could teach classes to the little children here in exchange for community service hours.

4-6 weeks

guest teachers

possible performance opportunity for the community

this sounds like a dream come true for me!

How can i make this a reality? any suggestions?

world surf competition= cautious Linds

Hey fam.

So here is the deal. little did i know upon my arrival here in costa rica, that there would be the world championship surf competition at the same time. and the time is now! its probably happening as you read this. people from all over the world come and compete in all different catagories. (i wanna see the tandem surfers!)

so anywho, the xtian surfer are there to represent. so please pray for the harvest to be like the waves, plentiful!! they played a film called "walking on water" and it presents the gospel 100%. one day every knee will know He's it! the Christ. why not today?

but yeah, i am taking the trip to Jaco/hermosa beach tomorrow (sunday) and will be sleeping on the beach at night. apparently its very common to have stuff stolen. so, i need extra protection in that arena. as well as in another. traveling with me is a couple, a 2 other dudes. i have a feeling one of them may like me. :/ and i dont like this feeling. but it's a time i get to shine in Christ. and explain howcome i have decided not to date, and want to develop healthful friendships, shared memories and truthful conversations. this makes me excited!

so 2 things, no 3 to pray for;)

1. safety to and fro jaco/hermosa

2. healthy relationships, embracing the ackwardness to creatively create an environment of truth and light.

3. this property my dad and i are looking at buying here. for God's will, and for peace in which ever way!

so, i will be gone till tuesday and ill let you know how it goes then! much love!

Oh wait: 1 more thing...

dude, i just danced at a local party for the past 3 hours! it was SUPER fun! ill confess there was a very handsome dude there (Z it was Jeronimo! haha), and i met him before, we danced together a lot! i was excited about dancing with him, because he is extremely outgoing and dances well. but he also was stoned and drunk. ;/ i love meeting people, because each story is beautifully different! how terrific!

so, if YOU have a prayer request about anything please let a sista know! hope all is well. give me stories, give me laughs, give me a little piece of your heart! j/k but would absolutly LOVE to hear what you are up too. so send me a quick update!

Love you!
Lindsay