we need each other :)

oh yes we do!
you need me
and I need YOU!

that's a little jungle i made up just now. i miss you friends and family. could you send me some scriptures to read? prayer requests? stories? :) i'm so excited!

This morning I was reading this scripture out of 1 corinthians 12. Recap, earlier this week, i went to a bible study. and a girl named Nicole was saying "my arm can't say, i'm going on vacation, so you can't use me today!" could you imagine, if your arm could do that? i am sorry if i have done that in my own selfish pursuit of self preservation. i realize i have operated in that MO before, and if it has been with you... im sorry. you could let me know and i'll apologize in person too! :)

Perhaps we need a little pow-wow! Or maybe just me! ok, stand up dance around, shake all the stresses and cares out. slap your body really hard to awaken it. feel the tingle. blood is joyfully running at full speed through our bodies! Jump and give God a big "YEAH!!" and then pretend your giving me a hug! haha. i love hugs so much!

Enough about me, it's all about God's kingdom. dude, i bet they have a really nice pad! it's probably got nature all around, it gets so dark at night... wait there is no day or night is there? only the light of Christ? well ive never seen that one, so i bet it's better than any beautiful thing ive seen, ill probably remember it longer too! and a marriage ceremony will happen with all of us, and christ. dude it's gonna be weird when all these different christians make up one body Christ will be married to, perfectly. brain in praise mode.

will holla later. :)




1-3 What I want to talk about now is the various ways God's Spirit gets worked into our lives. This is complex and often mis-understood, but I want you to be informed and knowledgeable. Remember how you were when you didn't know God, led from one phony god to another, never knowing what you were doing, just doing it because everybody else did it? It's different in this life. God wants us to use our intelligence, to seek to understand as well as we can. For instance, by using your heads, you know perfectly well that the Spirit of God would never prompt anyone to say "Jesus be damned!" Nor would anyone be inclined to say "Jesus is Master!" without the insight of the Holy Spirit.
4-11God's various gifts are handed out everywhere; but they all originate in God's Spirit. God's various ministries are carried out everywhere; but they all originate in God's Spirit. God's various expressions of power are in action everywhere; but God himself is behind it all. Each person is given something to do that shows who God is: Everyone gets in on it, everyone benefits. All kinds of things are handed out by the Spirit, and to all kinds of people! The variety is wonderful:

wise counsel

clear understanding

simple trust (he gave that one to me:)

healing the sick

miraculous acts

proclamation

distinguishing between spirits

tongues

interpretation of tongues.

All these gifts have a common origin, but are handed out one by one by the one Spirit of God. He decides who gets what, and when.

12-13You can easily enough see how this kind of thing works by looking no further than your own body. Your body has many parts—limbs, organs, cells—but no matter how many parts you can name, you're still one body. It's exactly the same with Christ. By means of his one Spirit, we all said good-bye to our partial and piecemeal lives. We each used to independently call our own shots, but then we entered into a large and integrated life in which he has the final say in everything. (This is what we proclaimed in word and action when we were baptized.) Each of us is now a part of his resurrection body, refreshed and sustained at one fountain—his Spirit—where we all come to drink. The old labels we once used to identify ourselves—labels like Jew or Greek, slave or free—are no longer useful. We need something larger, more comprehensive. (crazy!)

14-18I want you to think about how all this makes you more significant, not less. A body isn't just a single part blown up into something huge. It's all the different-but-similar parts arranged and functioning together. If Foot said, "I'm not elegant like Hand, embellished with rings; I guess I don't belong to this body," would that make it so? If Ear said, "I'm not beautiful like Eye, limpid and expressive; I don't deserve a place on the head," would you want to remove it from the body? If the body was all eye, how could it hear? If all ear, how could it smell? As it is, we see that God has carefully placed each part of the body right where he wanted it.

19-24But I also want you to think about how this keeps your significance from getting blown up into self-importance. For no matter how significant you are, it is only because of what you are a part of. An enormous eye or a gigantic hand wouldn't be a body, but a monster. What we have is one body with many parts, each its proper size and in its proper place. No part is important on its own. Can you imagine Eye telling Hand, "Get lost; I don't need you"? (:( sorry) Or, Head telling Foot, "You're fired; your job has been phased out"? As a matter of fact, in practice it works the other way—the "lower" the part, the more basic, and therefore necessary. You can live without an eye, for instance, but not without a stomach. When it's a part of your own body you are concerned with, it makes no difference whether the part is visible or clothed, higher or lower. You give it dignity and honor just as it is, without comparisons. If anything, you have more concern for the lower parts than the higher. If you had to choose, wouldn't you prefer good digestion to full-bodied hair?

25-26The way God designed our bodies is a model for understanding our lives together as a church: every part dependent on every other part, the parts we mention and the parts we don't, the parts we see and the parts we don't. If one part hurts, every other part is involved in the hurt, and in the healing. If one part flourishes, every other part enters into the exuberance.

27-31You are Christ's body—that's who you are! You must never forget this. Only as you accept your part of that body does your "part" mean anything. You're familiar with some of the parts that God has formed in his church, which is his "body":

apostles
prophets
teachers
miracle workers
healers
helpers
organizers
those who pray in tongues.
But it's obvious by now, isn't it, that Christ's church is a complete Body and not a gigantic, unidimensional Part? It's not all Apostle, not all Prophet, not all Miracle Worker, not all Healer, not all Prayer in Tongues, not all Interpreter of Tongues. And yet some of you keep competing for so-called "important" parts.

But now I want to lay out a far better way for you. it's love. duh! :)

the surf competition is coming up and i am going on sunday. please pray for us :)

love never ends. infatuation does.

for this to be honest, love must help me write this.

i always have wondered; "how long will it take to mend a broken heart?"

is it even repairable? i think my heart looks more like a gaping canyon. and less of a flat, connected peaceful prairie! haha

you know what though? it's totally cool, because Jesus can build a bridge with His resources. He can make my garden look anyway He wants it to look. Yes, i stupidly have allowed some very destructive people into my garden, that have treated it like garbage. but Jesus comes in and checks out the damage. starts to make some changes here and there, and it looks so beautiful!

you know the balm of gilead the bible talks about? it's like this salve that can pretty much repair anything and make it look shiny and new again. rub some of that on my old heart now, as i sit here thanking you that you have come!


Sometimes I feel like I keep repeating the same stupid mistakes in relationships. it starts off with a stranger, who i don't know, and i trust them with all my info, thinking they can handle it! dude, how unintelligent is it to "fall in love" with someone who is a stranger? to let them into the private territory of my heart, when they have absolutely no privilege coming in? even if they ask, i will now assume that they can not handle the beauty within all at once. it must be seen through a myriad of different windows. So i am in the process of devising a new way to fall in love... God's way through Lindsay.

1. first, walk in love with jesus. his love for me is always constant, He's my number 1 anyway, so i want to focus on Him, our feelings are mutual :)

2. grow healthy relationships with men, and treat them as brothers with honor. and expect the same in return.

3. expect amazing things from a God who loves me and has His best plan for me in His mind. i just have to wait for it! i love waiting, each day is one step closer to heaven, and marriage is another learning experience. i can allow it, or i can remain single. in both cases, i am with Love, and that's my home.

as of right now, i would like to get married, and share life with a person who is special and beautiful in Christ. who wouldn't? but i want to keep learning to have relationships with people in a healthy way that honors God and them. and then quite possibly take the steps towards getting married. dude, i don't know, i feel like this is kind of far off to be thinking about it now. o, whatever! haha God knows exactly and he will prepare me accordingly at the right time. all i get to do is relax, and make the best posibble decisions i can. they have faith everything will fit into place!

Lord, my prayer is to know how to healthfully navigate this particular kind of love. to be content, and alive right where i am always. to be intimately acquainted with you and others. you rock! in jesus christ name, amen

Things that have been instrumental in my healing from heart breaks. just in case you feel like reading. i just want to remember the things i have done, because they are great!

listening to Tid-bits of wisdom like...
"God is near to the broken hearted."
"If the flame was intense quickly, it will fizzle out just as fast."
"fall in love is insanity"
"be friends and stay true to yourself."

Listening to music
times: by tenth avenue north (current)

writing letters and praying through my emotions with God, and also with friends. thanks guys!!

and asking questions.

meditating on God's love for me, it makes me feel filled up with love and confidence.

i don't know why all of this came out now, but im confident there is a reason.

Linds

life is but a dream....

i rowed my boat away from the world today. i let go of hopes, dreams, relationships and other "stuff" i had been pursuing.

i felt scared when i did this because i didn't want to let these things go.

"if i let these things go, i don't know who ill be," i thought to myself...


so, there were two boats, and one boat had all the things that make me "me" on it. everything that identifies me is there on that boat. my experiences, dreams, wants... EVERYTHING. but on the other boat is jesus and me. that's all. i was holding on to the othe r boat by a rope. i knew if i let go... all hell would break lose and heaven would rejoice... so i let go. and then... the boats got sucked away to polar opposites of the sea. i am at sea with jesus, i have no clue where...

and I love it.

verse of inspiration luke 9 :23 ish

23-27Then he told them what they could expect for themselves: "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat—I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you? If any of you is embarrassed with me and the way I'm leading you, know that the Son of Man will be far more embarrassed with you when he arrives in all his splendor in company with the Father and the holy angels. This isn't, you realize, pie in the sky by and by. Some who have taken their stand right here are going to see it happen, see with their own eyes the kingdom of God."

and i shared my story of meeting Jesus with Pamela and her son, phil tonight. pamelas father is dying in the UK. she needs the love and support and prayer for God's perfect will over her life. rejoice, again i say rejoice, this is no pie in the sky by and by kind of faith. God's kingdom is coming to earth.

people who don't know what they are doing...

are winners! haha i just read this devotional by oswald chambers, and i'll post it here for you as well.


"God’s Purpose or Mine?
He made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side . . . —Mark 6:45
We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.

What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish— His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see "Him walking on the sea" with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see "Him walking on the sea" ( Mark 6:49 ). It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God.

God’s training is for now, not later. His purpose is for this very minute, not for sometime in the future. We have nothing to do with what will follow our obedience, and we are wrong to concern ourselves with it. What people call preparation, God sees as the goal itself.

God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious."

Questions: you can ask yourself, too. these are my answers, what are yours?

1. what am i expecting God to do?

Answer: i found myself expecting God to do things in my life that included stability, security and comfortability. but as a christian, i am finding that we are to expect God to just BE, and we are mere spectators invited to join the race. prize or goal? heaven. and that WILL be MORE than enough!

2. why does God prefer the process rather than the goal?

A: pretty much because He wants us to be quality people. for instance, i will use new age thinking, compared to christ centered thinking. a new age person worships an ambiguous god, with no emotion or substance. their god is not out to love them or hate them. not there to comfort, protect, justify or support. as compared to christ as God, he protects us, calls us winners when we know we are really losers. and most importantly is there to teach us how to love and have a fulfilling lifestyle here on earth. this is why i think God is more concerned about the process rather than the actual goal, because its in the process where we learn to love, appreciate, stay calm in the storms, and that makes Him look good!! :)

3. How in the world does He expect us to stay calm in the midst of a horrible storm??

A: by resting in Him. if Christ is the husband, do you really think he would let ANYTHING happen to this bride? seriously.


Updates: these can also be looked at as praises.

1. here at casa papaya, pamela, the owner, just found out her father is in a grave state. he is 86, so she may be flying out to the UK soon. please pray for her to recognize the sovereign hand of Christ's pursuit for her in her life. boldness and wisdom from the throne for myself, and fearlessness!!! yeah, baby!

2. this morning at the womens bible study i got invited too, we had a powerful meeting. there was a women named tanya there and her boyfriend is physically abusing her. she knew she needed God's strength to overcome this, and so she decided to come to the bible study! How beautiful, huh? i can't believe the things i am able to experience here. i want to cry with gratitude. it just shows that He really is an amazing God, that He could use us to play on His winning team! thanks God.

3. asking questions has changed my life! most of you know about my love life history, i won't dive into much detail there, only if you must know:) but i am looking for God's point of view concerning it. i have let go of EVERY other lover, but Christ. analogy time... it's as if i was at sea on a boat with everything i loved, my very life. but jesus and i hopped onto another boat, and i had a rope holding the 2 boats together. i visualized myself letting the rope go. it slipped away like a whirlwind, as if at my release, the boats separated us into 2 different worlds! i have no idea where christ and i are headed. some apprehensions have arised, but i remind myself who i am with. it's the christ! rejoice with me, because I am learning to walk and trust my lover.

"for whoever wants to save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for Me will save it." luke 9:23

you have my heart, and thank you for reading. would love your feedback!

lindsay

charlene is like linus from charley brown! i miss her!!!!

this was from a day when char, michelle and i went to the beach, we were all laying out, and a big waves came all the way up to where we were. charlene didnt get up quick enough and the wave ended us soaking her and her towel as she lay there. it was hysterical! we'll this is her walking back looking like linus from charley brown! i love it!

when was the last time...? + pics!

this entry is entitled "when was the last time...?" because i am going to ask you (and me) a series of questions, that will describe my day to you...
1. sat in your room all alone with classical music on, a homemade mask on your face, and was in your birthday suit? yep! sometimes you have to have some "you" time.

2. made yourself a fresh salad with raisins and walnuts, vinegar, lemon juice, tomatoes and some salt?

3. had a fresh mango for desert?

4. had a conversation about the successful life of Benjamin Franklin? did you know he has 14 moral expectations he would check off everynight? humility and generosity were on the list.

5. went to the beach? and had your hands and feet kissed by the water on the shore?

6. caught a straw hat being blown away from its owner?

7. rode on an ATV?

8. hitch hiked? that was a few days ago...

9. told you dad you are blessed to carry his name? i read a blog to my dad today, and it said how i was thankful for his efforts in providing an amazing life for me, he thanked me sincerely. it was a painfully precious moment.

10. read lips and talked to a computer, with no audible response? i felt like a looney person. :/

11. fed a stray dog?

12. last but not least... painted rocks?

yep, i did all those things. i had a terribly busy day. let me show you some pictures...

good news from a distant land.

God really pays off. God is WAY amazing! First I GET to spend time with Him, and then second, He gives me blessings!!! Dude, He seriously is AWE-mazing. Is EVERYTHING about Him good? That's why He is different from those fake gods. I feel so safe and rested in Him. Oh, I love Jesus! He is who He says He is.

let me tell you what just played out. first, i was just up in my room talking plainly with God. Thanking Him that someway I would be sending good news back home. i didn't think twice about it, but it was like He was in the room with me. and heard every word I said! because moments later, pamela (owner of casa papaya) knocked on my door, and sat down and talked with me for a few minutes with a letter she had written me. she wanted to thank me for bringing such wonderful guests with me, and how she looks forward to meeting the rest! in the letter she mentioned that when my dad arrives he can stay for free without paying any extra little charges. anyway, the most important thing was her heart of gratitude. she even gave me a gift of incense! we have shared moments with each other, with patience and understanding for each other, and God has been honored. I am thankful to be staying here, and it's been wonderful to see the movement of Jesus in our midst. It's like He is living here also. I can't see him, but i see His work. i don't see a tree growing, but i see the fruit ripening. dude, God is up to something up in here!!!!!



Prayer Requests

1. for pamela, because she will be moving to the middle east for a job. pray for her to be astonished by the way God is pursuing her.

2. mike (room next door) jew guy who loves yoga and girls. he is a man who wants a meaningful relationship one day, i hope he gets it.

3. gaby (yoga teacher) to recognize "pura vida" is in Christ. seriously.

side note:: i have decided not to participate in yoga anymore, because of it's roots in false idol worship. (any feedback on that?! i am open) because i really want to do yoga, but i cant offend my lover. im flirting with another "lover" when i participate. God is my only Lover. and I love that!!! :D im already married, i cant be flirting!

PRAISES and HIGHLIGHTS!

1. God is breaking off things in my life like... worry and body odor! haha. (ask if you really wanna know!) and adding to me boldness and openness about OUR relationship. and... got to talk with mike (jew guy who loves yoga and girls) about my relationship with jesus today! it was random and bold, and soo exhilarating!!

2. went to a fiesta last night in santa cruz! it was the province of guanacaste's independence day! was super fun!

3. had a super chill day.

im off to rest a little. but man, so many little life things happen, and i want to tell you ALL of them! just one more.... ill make it short.

Alejandro. let me introduce him. He's the original gangster of playa negra. he's been here for over 10 years. he's an all natural healing surfer, who is from argentina and sells womens clothing. yep. this man is so chill. i saw him eating a mango today at the beach, and i had to smile. but anyways, he gave me some earth clay stuff that i have been applying to my face regularly, and i'll tell you what... my face is gonna be flawless soon. it extracts bacteria from all the lotions and crap from the pores, and then tightens them. exfoliates the skin and makes it as soft as a babies behind! he lives down the street from casa papaya.

Ok, have a wonderful rest of your day! be joyful always :) talk to God about everything and say thanks all the time, for this is God's will for us in Christ Jesus. that has become my life verse... i love it's simplicity!

all my love!
Lindsay

today I became a home owner!!!

yes, it's true. pat me on the back. but...

i deserve no accolades, nor pats on the back. i did absolutely nothing to earn this title as a home owner. i just am.

you know the scoop, pops is sick. apparently. so, he has changed ownership of the house into my name. i think it's pretty awesome, because somehow, God thinks I can handle this. I know I can, through His strength and wisdom. I can do all things!

So, now to Costa Rica news...

[Highlights]

1. it's raining in the rain forest.
2. i got more of a suntan.
3. today is the independence day of Guanacaste!

[Updates]

1. will be teaching more classes in dance this week.
2. charlene and Michelle are leaving tomorrow back to san jose, and back to florida.
3. tomorrow is my first day of a new chapter here is costa.

If I had to describe this part of the trip in a brief synopsis, I would say it was like the honeymoon phase. dude, everything is daisies and sunshine. a time of discovery. newness. awareness of myself in a new environment, and responding to everything with delight and deliberateness.

i look forward to this new chapter, because it has been given to me to make the most out of. in life we have choices to make, and perspectives to uphold. it's like watching a little child grow. when they are babies, everything is new and exciting. when they grow up a little bit, you have to maintain the mindset that these children are precious gifts send to bless you. gifts to behold and treasure. yes, they can be ANNOYING. but even when they are annoying, it's original. when will you ever be able to capture this moment ever again? the answer is never. never again. ever. so enjoy that time with your blessing, because it could be gone in the blink of an eye.

so like i said, i am a proud home owner. i am proud to own the home my father labored and toiled over. the home he and his wife raised their blessings. my father, thought i was the best suitable owner for this place. and that is an honor. one i want to enjoy. a gift i want to handle with excellence, by paying all its bills on time. life is so cool. one day i am in diapers in my fathers arms, and a few 1,000 days later, im carrying his name and his legacy. it's a honor. thanks dad. i love YOU more.

be blessed loved ones. you have me heart.

oh, pray for me, with loving people no matter what. i get a little freaked out bout this new age junk. im researching it, and finding it desceptive and a lie. the only way i know how to handle it is through prayer. so, pray i will enjoy this learning experience and take enormous risks for the love of GOD! :)

i value You :)

Before i deluge into a story to make you feel sorry for me, and I won't be doing that intentionally, i must say this.

I am reminded even more that GOD is desiring me to treat other's with honor. circumstances speak.

I have two people that I am finding myself having pity towards. why? because one works as a servant in casa papaya.
and the second, is a surf instructor, who has very little honor when dealing with women.

My heart was in tension yesterday as we were following the surf instructor with our surf boards to a less crowded part of the shore. because earlier in the day, the instructor dude was eyeing me as I climbed up a tree. i knew by the look in his eye, he wasn't innocently staring. so as we walked, he asked me a question, "do you go to the gym?" laughing, I replied "no, im super active though, plus, I am a dance teacher." he laughed and told me i was lying.

i know his wife. she's american, from NYC and is an artist. she also runs a fabulous coffee shop, that would bank in the US....

so, do we treat each other with dishonor? i really can't find an explaination for it, or why this man would be so verbally disrespectful to me and especially to his wife and family. i didnt even tell you about the actual surf lesson. ill reassure you, he didn't hurt me, but i was verbally disrespected again and again. he gave all 3 of us free lessons. I would say he was a good surf teacher, because we could all surf afterwards. but, i certainly felt dehumanized, a little humiliated and disrespected.

vs.

evelyn. i'm sure ive introduced her here before, she cleans the house im staying in. she was my first friend here in costa, and she probably teaches me more spanish words than anyone else. but this morning, i found myself wanting to do her job, like she was too good to clean up after us american piglets. but, then i realized, i want to treat her with honor. this job is supporting her and her son in Nicaraqua. her son is 5. evelyn is 21. she's married to a kind man named nelson. i really admire her. i want to tell her that I admire her, too.

basically, today i have a number 2 today. (i don't know if i can focus on 2 things at the same time though, haha)

#1. Christ.
#2. finding ways to celebrate people. it's an experiment. ill let you know how it goes.

Prayer Requests

1. yesterday, gaby and i were talking about death. both of us have share the feelings of loss from death. both of us embrace it, and look for the new life that death always brings. i shared with her my testimony of how a 14 year old lindsay got saved. i teared up a little, just talking about it. she was moved to share with me her story. i am praying for these seeds to fall on the healthy, nutritious soil of her heart.

2. of course, the people in our house. to recognize the pursuit of Christ in their lifes. biggy.

3. surf instructor guy, to be the man of valor God intents him to be.

PRAISES!

1. there is a women here named Christine. she's a christian, she's married with 4 children. she's pretty young, i would say 34ish. she's got these amazing blue eyes, and a freedom in her voice. she laughs at the days that have passed, and she laughs at the days to come. I love this about her! she also takes my classes, and she says they make her sore. anyway, yesterday we were at avellanas, a beach nearby, and Christine was there. i felt like God saying inside my heart, tell her you can help her take care of her kids. so i did. and she was happy that I told her this information. :)

2. it's really cool here at the house. i feel as though we are aware and respectful of each other. we live harmoniously, and I thank jesus for this. i could imagine less than perfect situations. :) haha

3. you. i'm glad you're in my life too, i praise jesus for you, who are reading this. i have a roster of people who i believe read this and pray for me and love me, and for that I praise Him! :)

4. last but not least... the mono congos. dude, the monkeys here are so rad. i would download a video of them soon. :)

Thanks for the read.

mucho amor en the AWE-MAZING name of Jesus :D

it's simple.

Many things go through my brain each and every second of every day. it rarely stops, except when I put it in check. Christ is number 1. and i don't have a # 2 yet. I just keep it loose and keep it simple. He's number 1.

Lindsay's Updates with the 'Groms. ' aka dance class updates

the definition of a grom: origin, surf lingo. meaning: brilliant surfers who are 16 or younger.

yeah, i call them groms here, but not to their faces, because they already know they ROCK. haha.

class had a different flow tonight. the comunication here in costa can be delayed, so... the older people were supposed to come at 5:30 and the younger at 6:30. everyone showed up at 6. so... we did it tico style. everyone all together, young and old. we did conditioning. it was a blast of fun, for me! haha, hope everyone else is able to walk in the morning. lizzy, i could use your help!! :)

Highlights

1. got to pray and spend time with the one i love

2. picked mangos

3. ate lunch with my 2 beautiful friends

4. was given a delicious banana :)

5. had dinner made for me

6. stepped on sea urchin, that could have potentially pierced my foot, but didn't

7. fed a starving dog, we named it ethiopian aka ethie

8. loved on some cuties.

9. got to talk about the ragamuffin gospel with gaby. she asked about it.

10. dad got his passport! he is coming to costa rica!! lol, this is a miracle.

Praises

michelle arrived safely, she's so sweet. we are all amigas. today i got to share with her a little bit of my story. it was a really tender moment shared between us. His way is perfect, and she's a gem, that's all i can say.

drew, a guy staying here also, taught me a little music theory. he played 'happy birthday' for kattia's birthday tomorrow.

Charlene's Corner

other than she's a party animal, haha j/k, her and michelle are making me dinner as I type. I have great friends! Her sunburn and exhaustion have passed, now the peeling process has begun. (and fyi zoila for the record, i have yet to be burned, and the truth is, i only wore sunblock ONCE the whole time ive been here!) anyways, back to charlene, she's acclimating well to the natural a/c system we have here. ie open windows. Her Pocahantas alter ego is alive and thriving with all of the interestingly colored and shaped bugs here. she's become quite to expert! :)

I am so glad to have friends around me here. it's so special to have people with me to share this experience. ::sigh:: you're loved.

by Him.

and me.

and probably a few other! :)

may GOD bless.

<3>

can you pray for me?

1. pray for me. its been an interesting learning experience being challenged with the new age way of thinking. it's very similar to christianity. except one thing. no chirst. it's false and will lead people to death. the sheep are following a false shepherd. my heart is to show them with my life, the true shepherd, that will lead us to freedom, singing, joy, sight, health... shalom. life.

2. Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,   prone to leave the God I love;   here's my heart, O take and seal it,   seal it for thy courts above. that's how i feel sometimes. it frightens me. 

 3. Haven't I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take."  i want to remember this when I feel like that, up there. :)

4. charlene's cousin michelle is coming in today. I am praying for God's will, of course that she would be open to praying and we would be open to her as well. :)

5. the many people here who are hungry for God, but don't know what God's diet looks like, or have forgotten. That Christ would be the gourmet feast they're craving. dude, i can't wait for lunch!

i surfed with Forrest Folger's wife and kids today!!

Finally, I got the chance to go surfing... and it was so worth the wait!!!! Dude, apparently, Forrest is the best surfer here at negra. His wife is Gaby, is the yoga teacher, and his kids are Surria and Ananda, i get to teach them dance. haha

descriptions are needed to describe the sitcom of my existence:

Gaby, as you know, is the yoga teacher here. she's also married to forrest. She's drop dead gorgeous in every way. crazy curly wild hair just past her shoulders, tan skin, amazingly fit body, and a strikingly gentle personality, if that makes sense.

Forrest, they have been married for 10 years. blonde haired, well built californian surfer dude. does videos and shots for o'neil. he owns a few cabinas here, and rents them out to the tourists.

Surria: youngest diva, dances like noone is watching.

Ananda: The oldest, is seriously a trip. we do dance battles.

everyone in this family has 6 packs! Zoila, they remind me of that surf family, because they dont send the kids to school, and they eat really health consciously.

Gaby and I went out into the ocean, and she taught me how to catch/ride some las olas!!!!!! AHHH!!! I had a tubular time!! thanks to the Lord Jesus for giving me those lessons from island surf shop those early saturday mornings.

Dude, seriously, the new age acceptance here is predominant among the people. still convinced that new age thinking majors on the minors. For example, focusing on the pursuit of peace. the pursuit of happiness in life. the challenge of achieving nirvana, ect.

As a christian, the focus in Chirst.

Pray for my continued strength and joy from the throne of heaven, to be a light for His beautiful glory!

Shalom! Please write to mmmmeeeee some verses or something. I wanna hear what's going on in your hearts. and what God is stirring up in you!

pura vida. pure life.

pure life. pura vida. everyone says it to each other here, and it's seriously the mentality of the culture here. Costa is making me so laid back and chilled out. it's a little scary, because when i come back home to the states, i may actually become homeless. ha! the irony.

Lindsay before costa...

focused.

disciplined.

a little uptight.

determined to move forward.

always devising a money making senario.

active.

busy.

words like rat race, delivery, a little touch of stress, pressure, production, work, plans, calls, more plans, goals, chores ...run thru my mind as I reflect on the time just before leaving for costa rica. (and i was on holiday) im not going to get on a soap box about the culture americans live in, or even the christian sub culture. but the root word for culture is cult... which means excessive admiration for something, things that are popular to the general society.

what's popular and/or admired by us, americans? tv, cars, gas money, i mean these are things we think about on a daily basis. exercise, health, sports, education.... As im focusing on fostering pura vida, im reminded of things like substantial friendships grow over time, are nurtured with love, kindness and acceptance. people are humans, and not to be exploited for money, or tolerated so I can save face. i mean, jesus. jesus, himself, has enlightened me that we are all are blind, lame, weak, mute and a masterpiece of shattered dreams, searching desperately for an artist to identify our identity. i found myself asking others to identify me, and in turn have found these so called "artist" are not artist at all, but an unfinished magnum opus themselves.

one thing i know for sure. God is the ONLY artist i have found. and His son, Jesus, has generously built a bridge for us to get to Him. (btw, thank you Jesus for that!) I now ask God if He could identify the broken pieces, and perhaps contrive what You think would be best, that would meet mydeepest needs.

Lindsay in costa...

broken.

laughing.

dancing with kids.

breathing slowly

tomatoes and candy

dusty roads

swaying trees

rushing winds

bugs

humidity.

strolling.

time? what time is it? what day is it?

this is my new motto, relish in this God gifted moment, made to give Him glory, and worry later...

dude, what does a pure life look like as a believer? i think it's simple. correct me if im wrong, but its pretty straight forward, make God's kingdom govern you. what is His kingdom like? like this... full of joy, communicative and a place of always saying thanks!

thanks for reading

the unexplainable

The unexplainable.

So 2 unexplainable things occurred today. So let me explain.

#1 Church. haven't found one yet, but was searching for one on the internet lastnight. when pamela, the owner of casa papaya, was using my computer and she noticed I was looking for a church online. well, she told me this morning that she knows of a church nearby and they do lots of missions to the children who live in wastelands. my mind is blown outta my head. it's gone. on the floor. if char and i get an opportunity to go... were there!

#2 children. they are crazy! I can't even explain how cute these tan babies are! They are pretty mamas. We did hip hop tonight. I taught a class before, and it went well, but then came the crazies... we had so much fun. i need to video them somehow and post it. gaby, their mother, asked me what song we were dancing to, and of course i told her. grits, oh ah!

dude, this is poetry!

My life be like Ooh Ahh
CHORUS:
It's times like these that make me say,
Lord if you see me please come my way.
Leavin bread crumbs for when I stray
Rely on sacrifice and the price you paid
Feel me like a fingertip
(flow fingertip flow fingertip)
Sometimes I fall I slip
Got a heartfelt desire be more like you
Trying not to quench your fire by the things that i do

I'm on an island by my lonesome stranded
Low key and stayin� candid
Reflectin on the things I try my hand at
Search for the equations to persuasions I'm used to
Findin comfort in the zones of closet bones I get loose to
A mountainous fontaine,
Spinnin and monsoonin
Grinnin its high octane
This worlds out wacky
Rollin down the hills cause lifes a hassle
Encircled by my folly like a moat surround a castle
Stay afloat,
Catch a second wind thin is the air I breathe
Teary-eyed nose runnin, wipe the snot on my sleeve
I'm callin on my savior to be all that I need
Please forgive me my behavior had me lost at light speed

CHORUS

The fear of never falling in love
And the tears after losing the feelings
Of what you thought love was
Like the dirt still up under the rug
(My life be like)
Bad characteristics covered in Christ's blood
The joy of new birth and the pain of growing up
The bliss between giving my all and giving up
The highs and lows,
Paths and roads I chose
In the cold I froze
Trying to ease my woes
In this world of sin
Clothes to thin to fend
So to God I send
Words of help to win
In grumblings so deep letters could never express
So the sounds of Ooh Ahh beneath my breath projects

CHORUS

My life be like (Toby Mac)

My life be like ooh aah ooh
Dum dum diddy
Here comes that boy from the capital city
Last up on the Grits new ditty
But eight bars of the truth will do, eh
I believe there's a pride thats stunning,
And I believe in the kingdom coming
I believe if you seek the truth,
You don't need to look far cuz it's gonna find you

So why, oh why, do I trip and stumble?
And ooh ahh as commitments crumble?
I can't believe that I'm hear again

Lindsaaay's Relax Day went like this...

had a chill day. literally, i only left the house to eat a taco with charlene, and mike. he's our next door neighbor jew, dr. chiropractor.

took a nap.

taught the masses! haha i had 5 students, and a ton of fun!

how was your day? what did you learn? i learned something not to vital... i love looking at tatooed surfers. haha

I also learned that im not in control, and therefore, there is no reason to worry or fret.

todaluuuuuu

Xtra! Xtra! this just in...

Lindsay's Lesson Corner

Faith that can move a mustard seed. haha, I mean faith the size of a mustard seed can grow into a tree where pretty birds can perch and build a nest.

Dude, so again, I am realizing, that if you make yourself look at the positive side of any situation, you're going to see God's back. He is always moving in our lives right? Seriously, this new age stuff is becoming more and more clear to me. Satan is cleverly unveiling the mysteries of God, while focusing the power on each other, rather than CHRIST himself. My goodness, pray for the people here, especially Gabriella, she's beautiful in EVERY WAY, but is choosing to receive power from idols, that will always let her down.

and pray for me, that I can be a light for the One True Lover. :) Jesus Christ. I have to be bold here, so that this reality will continually manifest itself. Jesus, is Lord. How exciting? Because He is a lover, teacher, family healer, creator... you name it, if it's good, HE does it!!!

OK,

It's Highlights Time!!!!

1. Brina illegedly found a $10 ticket to come here. We shall wait and see. AHH! that would be so awesome!

2. Dad is doing well, better than I thought he would be doing! He told me Colby said he missed me the other day, I told him, "Ill smack colby's lips off" and my dad laughed! i love it when that happens... :)

3. we body surfed at the shandy beach, where i had a moment of panic when I washed up on the rocks. I have nothing to be afraid of really, except in my head, rocks + creepy sea creatures= freaked out LIndsay Brown

4. I realized today, that real monkeys are here. I heard them, saw them. it's just bizarre

5. I cried a little on the hammock. I was sad, because I got done reading the first chapter of Love, Sex, and Lasting Relationships, and I realized how much I have failed. How Hollywood my mindset is concerning relationships.

::find a person:: step one

::fall in love:: step 2

::make them the center of your life:: step 3

::repeat when it ends:: i lost it

Im done, I am a women of unclean lips. Lord, thank you for undo-ing me. I need to learn from you, you're ways are easy and you carry light burdens. Please transform my thinking to match yours. I'm seriously desperate. This is cycle is rediculous, my heart broken, your way... unknown. but i trust you, duh! you're God.

Lindsay, I love it when you realize I'm perfect, isn't it cool?!

I shout with joy... "Yes! thank you KING!"

6. I can hear the roar of the ocean from my balcony seat right now. it sounds powerful. like its made of only muscles.

7. I miss my friends. and I thought about them today. I even said a prayer of intercession, that the joy of God would be theres, and it would bring glory back to Jesus. that was unexpected. it was during yoga class.

Charlene's Corner

Let me introduce, Charlene. She's my friend. Dude, if you've never met her, it's because... well i dont know why. but you should. She is here with me right now, and we are so happy. I mean we give thanks for the smallest things, like falling off the bikes, when we've raced down uncontrollably hills and landed fine. but fell off only because a foot simply slipped off the petal.

Oh, but tonight I ran into the room dancing because I had to pee, and the thought drifted through my head, "i wonder where charlene is?" well, i found her sitting on the bathroom floor with the lights off. char, had just awoken from falling asleep. she felt like she was going to hurl, from a splitting headache she's had all day. and she just feel asleep there. :( It was so sad. seriously, i was so sad for her.

Oh, and another thing I want to highlight about Charlene, is that she is so cool. she's a really good sport. I mean she tries everything, and I call her Pocahantas, because she has a way of talking to all the bugs and creatures. They are drawn to her! Oh the worms visit her while she's sunning. The moskitos gentle suck her blood while outdoors. She has a way with the bugs here in Costa Rica. They are rejoicing, because Pocahantas has come! Someone to acknowledge that they are alive too. It makes me smile, because she really is a good sport.

SONG CORNER

songs have a way of bringing emotions to the surface for me. Sufjan Stevens is pretty much my music crush right now. He's hhhoooottttttt!

I'd swim across Lake Michigan
I'd sell my shoes
I'd give my body to be back again
In the rest of the room
To be alone with you
To be alone with you
To be alone with you
To be alone with you

You gave your body to the lonely
They took your clothes
You gave up a wife and a family
You gave your ghost
To be alone with me
To be alone with me
To be alone with me
You went up on a tree

To be alone with me
You went up on a tree

I've never known a man who loved me

con gusto! Lindsay

All I want... (poem)

All I want...

is just to remember you!

Remember, my lover, when we first met?

I broke his heart, sold all and kept...

your words so close next to my heart

and knew somehow we'd never part.

again, i thought you wern't enough

to please my every aching trot

a genie to call on in a time of need

and not a lover, who was out for me.

On my behalf, O sacred One,

has your love poured out through your son

you let him die, so I would know

you heart and that it beats and grows

in love for me each day I cry

not willing to admit you satify

my real desires, my wants and dreams

Oh God, I decided to accept

leaving tomorrow, MUST GO TO SLEEP...

The night before...

List of praises!

1. Didn't take dad to the hospital! :) please pray for health

2. Aunt Little bit got a great dane that is eye level with her kitchen counter tops. I think she finally met her match!

3. Went on a boat today! whoaaa hooo!

4. Heard a crazy story about Clark. (will write more later) also pray for his mental health (COME ON FEEL THE ILLINOISE)

5. Lizzie made my day by remembering to get the blog site. (it's the little things that matter :)

6. Charlene's prayers!

7. Got my herbal remedies, I'm packed (almost) and ready!!

8. Got paid $100 bucks for enduring a cat attack! haha

Dude, today WAS pretty crazy!

I love you Jesus! I thank God you guys devised a crazy plan to bring us into a restored relationship with the FATHER. G.O.D.! beyond my mental cap right now.

Anyhow! I am also so thankful for Aunt Patty giving me some peace and perspective with dad.

Zoila, my mama, always looking out for me and praying for me.

Seriously? Where would I be?!

Lyrics that actually made me cry, because i felt the pain for Clark.

Sufjan Stevens : come on, feel the illiNoise

This is dedicated to that guy Clark. Seriously, this man wanted to be a women so bad that he wrapped rubberbands around his man parts so that they wouldn't work anymore. We are seriously hurting as a people. My Lord, have mercy, and please help us poor sinners along. we need your intervention.

I cried myself to sleep last night
And the ghost of Carl, he approached my window
I was hypnotized, I was asked
To improvise
On the attitude, the regret
Of a thousand centuries of death

Even with the heart of terror and the superstitious wearer
I am riding all alone
I am writing all alone

Even in my best condition, counting all the superstition
I am riding all alone
I am running all alone

And we laughed at the beatitudes of a thousand lines
We were asked at the attitudes
They reminded us of death

Even with the rest belated, everything is antiquated
Are you writing from the heart?
Are you writing from the heart?

Even in his heart the Devil has to know the water level
Are you writing from the heart?
Are you writing from the heart?

And I cried myself to sleep last night
For the Earth, and materials, they may sound just right to me

Even with the rest belated, everything is antiquated
Are you writing from the heart?
Are you writing from the heart?

Even in his heart the Devil has to know the water level
Are you writing from the heart?
Are you writing from the heart?

Sufjan Steven: Chicago

hope.

you came to take us
all things go, all things go
to recreate us
all things grow, all things grow
we had our mindset
all things know, all things know
you had to find it
all things go, all things go

you came to take us
all things go, all things go
to recreate us
all things grow, all things grow
we had our mindset
(I made a lot of mistakes)
all things know, all things know
(I made a lot of mistakes)
you had to find it
(I made a lot of mistakes)
all things go, all things go
(I made a lot of mistakes)

Love.

Joy.

Peace.

Yours.

my Friend.

through Jesus.

alone.

Shalom,

Lindsay

thank you friend! Check out this video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ss69kfHqN1A

hopeless romantics remember...

oct. 15, 08

And then in the dawn

I saw him He whom my heart loveth

I found him, held him and told him

I could never let him go.

Jesus, this is the way your heart beats for me. This is the way my heart is excited to beat for you.

"He insisted that his father is crazy with love. That God is a kooky God who can scarcely bear to be without us. "

"O Shepherd, when you said Love and pain go together, how truly you spoke."

Sometimes I want to ask God to not speak so truly, but if He didn't I wouldn't be free. Truth has everything to do with our freedom. If I asked God to take me out of my life right now, how would he take that? I think it would be like a smack in the face to God. Us saying to God, "hey, I know you know what you're doing, but maybe you should try it my way. I think your way is lame." Shoot, if that's what my complaining is like to God, them I am sorry. I don't want to complain. Better yet, I embrace this, the hurt, pain, ackwardness and sadness. If this is what it takes to live for Christ, I want it all.

Lately, passing minutes have been ones full of inspiration and opportunity. It's nice to relax into a conversation, or to shake someones dirty hand. Your clean hand in theirs and all is well with the world. :) I like this. Offer a pretty flower to someone pretty, or just listen to the wind blow around you. Thru the trees, around the boats and benches, sweeping the streets. I like this too. Oh, and racing bikes against the wind, or just opening my ears to the down pour outside my window. It's probably the closest parallel of what my eyes want to do, but are just too dry to. O Lord, help me to see you clearly all of my days. To know your unrelenting love for me and my neighbor. Let justice reign on the streets and in my life.

Fullfilling. cheerful. hugs make me happy.

can it seriously get any better?

ADORATION

Look at the God of Abraham, the one who created the entire earth by His word? There is no beginning and no end in Him. This is the ONE I believe in, and I am overwhelmed! I am fulfilled, I am satisfied. I am helped in my time of heart break, loved when I make thoughtless, foolish mistakes. Asked to live in freedom, when bondage seemed so familiar. I went from nothing to eternity. The last, overlooked, poor, slaves are first to be chosen in this Kingdom. He didn't just call smart, "put together" people, but prefers the mediocre man. He gave the low man a purpose in Him. He accepts all.

RECENTLY ACCOMPLISHED

As I sit in my dining room, 4 days away from jumping on a plane and landing in a different nation, I am pretty excited!! I just wanted to document some info...

As of late, I got my two upper wisdom teeth pulled yesterday, and it was an exciting/ nerve racking event. It seriously didn't hurt at all! The part I especially appreciated was that my dentist walked me through each thing he was doing. He started by numbing my jaw, which is normal, and boy am I glad I didn't have to endure that pain without it. But after that, he basically dug around my tooth, then drilled a piece off, so that he could get leverage. then he pulled! As he was pulling, I was praying God would grant him favor, because I didnt know what would happen. But everything went smoothly. $350 bucks later, I was sitting with ice on my cheeks, and happy as could be! haha Dude, it was unbelievable because my mouth didnt even swell! *(pictures?)

I also got bit by a cat, which reports say are the worse animal bites, because 50% become infected. Did you know they could become fatal as well? ** As did mine. not fatal, but infected. It swelled up and became red, but I didn't want to take antibiotics(anti-life), because they can mess up the "ecosystem" (for lack of a better word) of your tummy. So I took probiotics(pro-life), and iced my hand while I iced my cheeks... it was a win win situation! how glorious! I love productivity.

CURRENTLY DOING

Anyways, the most important things I have been learning lately have been REALLY cool. I know I may sound abnormally peppy, it's been apart of what I have been learning. There is a scripture that has pretty much changed my life.

"Be joyful ALWAYS, pray continually, and give thanks in all situations for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

Along with reading this book "awaken the giant within" by tony robbins and going through an unexpected (but greatly appreciated) heart break, I have been focusing on the positives of life. Seriously, I need to change, and the only way I have found is to take God at His word. I started looking at the goals I want to accomplish, which is simply place GOD first. Secondly, I have been asking for more guidance, and wisdom as well as discernment from Him. Lastly, I have been searching restlessly for something to be thankful in every situation. This has seriously, changed my life. My thoughts have been life giving, because they are focusing on God and the good He is accomplishing in my life.

This season has been very impactful on my relationship with Jesus, as well as my life as a whole in general. Just for leverage, Paul was very positive in His view towards Jesus, he understood that through his trials, he was accomplishing his goal, which was to know Christ and him crucified. Homeboy was almost crucified tons of times, by all kinds of things, and I have a hunch that he knew Jesus pretty well. :) Nonetheless, I give all the glory to God for this change of path, because it started off with decisions, and how powerful they can be. then it lead to putting God first, and making myself excited about it. then it snowballed into falling in love with my "first love" again, which made putting him first easy!! now its a season of studying. so here goes nothing, Lord, I will study, and love every minute you give to do to just that. May it ALL be for the glory of Jesus. come and touch my scars.

** The reason why cat bites are so dangerous is because cats werent domesticated till waaayyy after dogs. Which means they developed some pretty mean ways of defense. Apparently when they hiss, it coats their teeth with disgusting bacteria, so that when they eventually bite, they mess you up.

I've got 2 thoughts

The first one came from thinking about the New Age movement. It has a way of explaining the things f God is lame mans terms, but it denies where the power comes from. New Age says the Universe will make things happen as you visualize goals and desires. In agreement with making your goals and desires known to God, through prayer, what a sweet intimate way of communication that is, God orchestrates things in the spiritual realm on our behalf in accordance with His plan. It's scary because of the scriptures in 2 Timothy...

¹But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days.²People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,³without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, ⁴treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— ⁵having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them.

2nd thought is about... not fretting, because it leads to evil. In Oswald Chambers devotional, my utmost for His highest, he wrote that fussing is essentially forcing and elbowing for your desires to be manifested. But resting in God, even though circumstances may be crazy, doesn't depend on the circumstances, but on your relationship. OK, so if God, my providing, amazing, faithfully loving and caring husband knows of my way, he wants me to trust him that he will orchestrate perfectly and timely. But when I start worrying and letting my mind go into unrest mode, God says that will ALWAYS lead to evil.

"Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil." I Won't fret about a thing, lover. For I am just jazzed to be her. My dove, there is no flaw in you.